We got our boxer puppy Charlie more than a year and a half ago. He was a nice, loyal, friendly, and forgiving puppy throughout his life who was eager to please and play and be petted. Charlie got very sick almost two months ago and had gone steadily downhill, not eating or drinking and being very lethargic. After several trips to the vet where they couldn't find anything specifically wrong and yet seeing Charlie wither from a healthy and vibrant 70-pound dog into a heartbreaking 51 pounds of emaciation, Paul and I made the very difficult decision to put him to sleep.
Carson and Layla took the news very hard last night, as they view Charlie as their brother.
It was heartbreaking, especially after feeling very emotionally vulnerable and drained just from having to make the decision, for Paul and me to watch these children prepare for the loss. We did our best to let them feel their feelings. We all shed tears. Well, except for Addie. She took it literally when we said Charlie would be "put to sleep" and, despite her best efforts to keep up with the emotionally charged conversation, she couldn't quite understand, really, what all the fuss was about.
But as I was spokesperson for our family prayer last night, she interrupted with this prompt for me: "and ask Him to see if Grampa Boyd [who died last year] can take care of Charlie in heaven." So cute and sweet, and there was not a dry eye to be found.
It's strange the things that unify us as families, isn't it? For our family, this is one of those things.
Larry and Joyce kindly offered up a spot near their cabin to bury this good dog. After school, the kids planned out a funeral, and we all headed up to dig his grave after dinner. Larry helped dig, Joyce brought some mums to plant, and Gramma Phyllis let the kids cut some flowers from her cabin site. Each of these things meant a lot to the kids.
Violet liked staring at the leaves.
The funeral, conducted excellently by Carson (who was a trooper at trying to keep his emotions in check), went something like this:
- We sang, "How much is that doggie in the window."
- Everyone shared one or two or three things they liked about Charlie.
- Some people shared some favorite memories about Charlie. These included his rolling around in/on a dead fish at Bear Lake and stinking super bad as a result, being thrown into Bear Lake over and over and swimming back, playing hula hoop chase with the grandkids at L&J's, running so happily through some floodwater up at the cabin last year, running so happily through snow up at the cabin (can you see why it's apropos for him to be buried there? he loved the place), wrestling with Carson, eating socks, and just being a nice and fun puppy all around.
- Everyone put one of Charlie's favorite toys in his box. These included a squeaky chew toy, a fake bone, a kong ball, a piece of hula hoop (his favorite), a rubber boomerang, and some other things that I can't remember now.
Then Carson asked Grampa Larry to say the prayer, the grave was covered with dirt and lots of rocks and flowers, and we said our goodbyes. With lots of opportunities to visit him.
Charlie went peacefully and calmly, and it makes us all glad that he's out of his misery now. But, for all my previous complaints about the logistics and realities (sometimes frustrating) of dog ownership, the house feels empty. We all keep thinking Charlie is going to come bounding down the stairs or to the door or into the room or or or... As Paul put it, "I didn't realize how much I liked him." I agree.
Life marches on. It's a good, although incredibly hard, thing for our children to experience. Their little hearts are very tender.
Rest in peace, Chuck. Your life was far too short, but it was a good one. We're a better family for having you in our lives.
09/01/10 - 05/30/12
4 comments:
I'm so sad for your kids but am way impressed with your parenting. :-(
Wow, I was expecting to hear your fish had died...not your dog! So sad. I understand the sadness and send my love to you and your sweet kids. Love the opening song.
This was a beautiful post, and anyone who has had to put an animal to sleep can identify with your feelings. We had to put LuLu to sleep last year after she too went from a healthy basset to an exhausted, emaciated mess. It was horrible, but enormously meaningful. We feel she is with us in spirit. Allowing your children to do some anticipatory grieving is great parenting, and something they will remember.
Oh Brittney - how sad for you and your family. The pictures of your kids look sooo sad. Layla has told us many stories of her "Boxer dog" and leaned over Sunday to tell me the sad news. I am so sorry.
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